This is a subject I know intimately. My mom survived a severe brain hemorrhage when I was in my late 20’s. She should have died, and the doctors did prepare me for that, but she had a miraculous recovery, with full use of her body and most of her mind, except for some memory problems and the convenient inability to do anything that’s not fun. I attribute her coming out of a coma in the ICU to the fact that she had a near death experience (more on this at another time) and her soul wasn’t ready to leave. But her body and brain have been challenged, sometimes more than others, and I have been her caregiver ever since. I wouldn’t have survived these years without flower remedies and homeopathy. Aside from my clients, she has been my biggest teacher. I have learned about remedies for strokes, drug withdrawal, anesthesia reaction, pre and post-op care, and that’s just the physical.
“If you think you are enlightened, go and spend a week with your family.”
— Ram Dass
My mother spent time with Ram Dass in the 60’s when she lived at Millbrook, the estate of “turned-on” millionaire, Billy Hitchcock, in the Hudson Valley. Hitchcock had opened his estate to Timothy Leary and Ram Dass and it became ground zero for the psychedelic movement. She speaks of Ram Dass and those times often, and fondly. Images of him standing over the stove in a loincloth, making porridge, Tim Hardin sleeping on a mattress in the garden. I am trying to get her to write her biography. I’ll need a new flower remedy for that haha.
Ram Dass, late 60s, from “Birth of a Psychedelic Culture”
There are so many complicated dynamics to longterm caregiving. It can bring up childhood trauma, resentment and anxiety. The more evolved of us will see this as a great experience for our soul’s development, but I am here to remind you, it’s o.k. if you lose it at times, freak out, break down, act like a baby, act like a teenager, bang your head against the wall—It’s all part of the process. But flowers remedies can help you get through it with grace, and your adrenals, intact!
Flower Remedies for Caregivers
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Relieves feelings of overwhelming responsibility. This is for those of you who are in a position where someone is relying on you, so you can’t give up or quit. You have to keep going. You may feel so stressed that you are on the verge of a nervous breakdown, that you are all alone in this, that there is no relief. Physically, you may have intense muscle tension and incredible fatigue. When you need it, Unburden works fast and is like someone throwing you a lifeline.
This is for the intense worry for someone you love. You may not be in the responsibility phase, but perhaps they are in the hospital or are ill and you can’t stop the looping "what if” thoughts about their safety. Hypervigilance. Peaceful Worrier will replace those fears with faith that they are being taken care of and all will be o.k. The patient/loved one can feel it when you see them as healed and safe and this is very beneficial for their own healing.
For some of us, other's suffering is worse than our own. If you feel intensely affected by the pain of your loved one, worry about them, feel guilty about their situation or feel you are absorbing their energy, even manifesting similar symptoms, Pathos will give you the ability to care for them without it overtaking you. You will still be compassionate but you will be able to keep your energy separate. Also good for those who neglect themselves when helping others.
There may come a time during caregiving that you find your self in a rage (or at least irritable). Usually parents are the ones that trigger this. They may be critical or unappreciative of all you’re doing. When you’re already at the end of your rope, one wrong word can be enough to make you snap. If you feel resentful of the position you have found your self in-maybe your siblings are out of the picture and you’re left holding the bag. Or you’ve been neglecting your self and feel like a servant and that it’s not fair, It’s All Good will keep you in a place of love and gratitude, so that things just roll off your back. This isn’t why you are doing this, but people will say "you’re a saint,” and you will feel like one.
(For us and them)
I never leave home without it. I also make sure my mom always has one in her bag and if she calls in distress, I tell her to go take four drops and stay on the phone with her until she is calm. I have given this to her so many times when she seemed off, dizzy, agitated and always before doctor visits and exams. And of course, I take it myself at these times too-when she had a fall and during hospital visits. Not only does it help with trauma, but it’s cleansing and protecting. I find hospitals to be really hard for me and FAK keeps me in my protected bubble.
Homeopathic Remedies for You and Them
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These remedies are in the Accident and Emergency Kit (200C potency) and Basic 36 (in 30C potency).
Arnica
This is the remedy to give when there has been a fall or accident to prevent trauma, bruising and pain. I usually do one dose of 200C potency for big emergencies. One dose then observe. If you only have 30C that’s fine, but you will need to give it more often (every 2-4 hours until you see improvement, then stop). Arnica can lessen the severity of the injury and speed healing. My great teacher, George Vithoulkas, had said that you can use arnica 200C as the first remedy for strokes (later you may need different remedies for the specific symptoms). Well, I got to test that out. My mom and I were visiting friends one evening and she started acting weird, nodding off while our friend was telling a story. I thought, “I know this is boring, but behave yourself!” Later, when she was speaking strangely, I knew she was having a stroke and I took her to the E.R. In the waiting room, I remembered George’s arnica story and gave her a dose. By the time they came to check her in and take her vitals, she was speaking normally! Arnica is also my go-to after surgery. One dose of 200C to speed healing and prevent bruising or 30C four times a day for a few days. Also, see my phosphorus section about anesthesia.
Disclaimer: please don’t use arnica instead of medical care!
Aconite
This is the remedy for panic during times of trauma. My mom had a fall last year and had to get surgery. The medical team accidentally let the curtain in her room fall open when they were prepping her and I saw her injury. I nearly fainted and I couldn’t stop hyperventilating and crying. I went to my car and took a dose of aconite 200C and within seconds I felt calm. It felt as if I had been given a shot of the best sedative. That one dose kept me calm for weeks while I was doing after-care. This is also a great remedy to give your loved one if trauma has made them fearful. Also useful for pre-surgery fear. One dose of 200C or 30C is all that is needed.
Phosphorus
This is the remedy I give after surgery to help prevent/counteract a bad reaction to general anesthesia. I usually give one dose of 30C after they come out. I will repeat the remedy if needed later on and usually two doses of 30C is all that is needed, or one dose of 200C.
*If you want to give phosphorus and arnica after surgery, give the phosphorus first to immediately counteract the anesthesia. After six hours, give arnica.
Disclaimer: do not use phosphorus in place of medical care! Always consult your doctor.
Bioplasma Cell Salts
(Not in the homeopathy kits)
Cell salts are an interesting healing tool, somewhere between minerals and homeopathy. There are 12 minerals we can use individually for specific ailments, but Bioplasma is a combo of all 12. Take this daily and give to your loved one and it will keep you strong and healthy. It’s a cure all and so good for the nervous system.
Care for Caregivers
Do not put off self care! I often used to say, “Oh I’ll take a shower once I am done with doing this chore,” or "I’ll see my friends after this difficult period is over” or "I’ll go for my own medical check-up once this crisis is over.” Please don’t do this. Your own health can deteriorate quickly when you are under the kind of stress caregiving brings. You must stay on top of your own health too.
Eat regularly: Prioritize healthy, delicious meals.
Stay hydrated: Don’t just drink coffee to keep going. Take electrolytes.
Do self care: Take naps. Take candlelight baths with magnesium flakes. Keep up your skin care routine up. Get sunshine in the morning.
Take your supplements: Magnesium, Vitamin C, Bioplasma and especially B vitamins for the nervous system. Ask for help.
LOVE YOUR SELF TOO! THERE IS ENOUGH TO GO AROUND
Love,
Alexis
*These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat or prevent any disease.
Alexis Smart is not a medical doctor and does not offer medical or psychological advice, nor diagnose, treat or prevent any disease. If you have a medical issue, please consult your doctor.